Mayonnaise
by Hopelessly Unromantic
Summary: All-dialogue alternate universe one-shot. -Well, I'm so sorry, but last time I checked, we were sixteen, not six.-


**A/N: **I'm on a roll! YEAH, BABY, YEAH!(: But I still feel like crap, but getting better? I don't know. _**IT'S GOING TO KILL ME FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE! **_Wait…is it too early? Oh well(: There are no penguins in Alaska after all. Oh…I'm attempting AU…so…names should be obvious though…

**DISCLAIMER:** Am I supposed to own anything? :D (No.)

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**Mayonnaise**

"_Everyone is the age of their heart."_

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"WHY CAN'T YOU JUST GROW UP?"

"WHY CAN'T YOU ACT LIKE A KID?"

"WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM, WEST?"

"WHAT DO YOU THINK? IT'S THIS _THING_ IN FRONT OF ME!"

"Mayonnaise?"

"Shut up, Richard."

"If I do, will you quit shouting? You're making a scene."

"So? SHE started it!"

"DID NOT!"

"DID TOO!"

"Stop it! BOTH OF YOU! You're acting childish."

"Hey! Wally's childish. He can't figure out how to just…I don't know, GROW UP."

"Well, Jezebel here can't figure out how to just ACT LIKE A KID."

"Well, I'm so sorry, but last time I checked, we were sixteen, _not six_."

"What does AGE have to do with this?"

"Wally…she's sort of right. I think it's time to grow up."

"WHAT? RICHARD, YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND, AND I LOVE YOU AND EVERYTHING, BUT YOU CAN'T JUST DECIDE TO GROW UP! IT COMES WITH _TIME_."

"And it's been past time for you to grow up."

"You shut up, Jezebel."

"Hey. You are the one who started this whole argument."

"Again, it's not my fault you can't just act like a kid for once."

"…"

"Wally? Seriously?"

"What do you mean?"

"I never had a real childhood, West. You know what? Thanks; just forget it. What were we even fighting about? Mayonnaise? I hate mayonnaise. I prefer ketchup."

"I like—"

"Quit changing the subject, Jezebel."

"If you would have stayed quiet, Mr. Grayson, I would have gotten away with changing the subject, thankyouverymuch."

"Too bad. You need to apologize. It's not right to tell someone to grow up."

"Oh dear best friend, you told me to grow up too."

"But I'm your best friend; it's different."

"No it's not."

"I agree with her for once."

"Well…"

"Apologize, Richey."

"I'm sorry for telling you to grow up, Wally. Your turn, Jezebel."

"I don't have to. I hate Wallace."

"Gee. Thanks."

"You are oh so welcome! Are we done?"

"NO! WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS TRYING TO LEAVE?"

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN? IT'S ALWAYS YOU WHO MAKES ME _WANT _TO LEAVE, NOT MR. RICHARD GRAYSON OVER HERE, MINDING HIS OWN BUISNESS, EATING HIS SANDWICH WITH MAYONNAISE!"

"Really, Jezebel?"

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT! HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO KNOW HOW I MAKE YOU FEEL?"

"I DON'T KNOW…GUESS? ASK? EVER THOUGHT OF THAT, WEST?"

"Guys…you're making a scene…again."

"SO HOW DO I MAKE YOU FEEL?"

"LIKE A PIECE OF TRASH! AM I? HUH?"

"OH YEAH? WHAT ABOUT HOW YOU MAKE ME FEEL?"

"AND HOW WOULD THAT BE, OH GREAT ONE?"

"LIKE I'M WORTHLESS!"

"This can't be good."

"MAYBE I THOUGHT YOU WERE ACTUALLY WORTH SOMETHING! SOMETHING THAT'S WORTH A LOT, ACTUALLY! DID YOU EVER THINK ABOUT THAT?"

"MAYBE I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU WERE AN AMAZING PERSON, JEZEBEL!"

"AND MAYBE I THOUGHT YOU WERE PRETTY AMAZING TOO!"

"AND JUST MAYBE, I THOUGHT YOU WERE PRETTY TOO!"

"WELL, GOOD! MAYBE I THOUGHT YOU WERE PRETTY TOO!"

"You can't call a guy pretty…It's not…manly…"

"MAYBE I ALWAYS LIKED YOU ALL ALONG, BUT I NEVER KNEW HOW TO EXPRESS IT!"

"MAYBE I FELT THE SAME WAY!"

"Wally?"

"…Well…that's…good. I like you."

"I _HATE_ YOU!"

"Jezebel!"

"What, Richard? I'm being expressive."

"It's okay…I hate you too."

"I hate mayonnaise more."

"Mayonnaise is disgusting. I don't know how you like it, Richard."

"It's a good condiment."

"Ketchup is better. I prefer ketchup. What do you prefer, Wally?"

"I like ketchup too, Jezebel. How do you feel about ranch?"

"I like ranch…but not as much as ketchup."

"And why would that be, madam?"

"It's not red."

"And color is important because?"

"I like the color red. It happens to be the hair color of the guy I like, you know."

"Oh, really now? So you like Roy? How can anyone like that self-centered jerk?"

"Guys…"

"Aren't you his friend though?"

"Your point?"

"Never mind. I don't like Roy. Where would you get that idea?"

"He has red hair…"

"It's orange, not red."

"I stand corrected."

"GUYS."

"WHAT!"

"WHAT?"

"Just get on with it, already!"

"What ever do you mean by that, Mister Richard Grayson, sir?"

"Oh…brother…I'm leaving."

"Good-bye, best friend! Enjoy your mayonnaise!"

"…"

"So, Jezebel. Do I know this guy you like?"

"I think you're pretty close to him."

"Oh. Well, can you describe him to me?"

"He's got red, NOT ORANGE, hair, a crooked smile, some odd freckles splattered across his face, and is in bad need of some growing up to be done, you know."

"You know what? I think I might know this guy."

"Really?"

"Yeah…does his name happen to be Wally?"

"Nope. His name is Wallace West."

"I like this kid too. He's a good one. You better hold on to him."

"I think I might do just that."

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**A/N: **As y'all can probably tell this isn't just Jinx (or Jezebel) and Kid Flash (or Wally/Wallace West). It also has Richard (or Robin, the boy wonder). Sorry if it's sort of complicated to understand, but just PM me about a part, and I'll explain it…or just review. That'll work too(:

Personally, I prefer ranch over anything else…and then salsa. Please do tell me what you like; I want to know. I CAN STALK YOU WITH IT! :D Kidding. I wouldn't stalk you…maybe. Except maybe some people I already know in real life. And either way, I sort of already DO stalk them…and yeah…weird…ANYWAYS…time to officially sing you people out on YOUR way to happiness (not mine. My way to happiness involves starting a flamingo farm. 14 flamingos and on my way to happiness.) _**I GOT YOUR PICTURE, I'M COMING WITH YOU, DEAR MARIA COUNT ME IN! THERE'S A STORY AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS BOTTLE, AND I'M THE PEN!**_


End file.
